It is hard to find the perfect mate
Our group's topic is the perfect mate, Every one has some fantasy about the perfect mate, he or she is handsome, beautiful, rich, elegant, gentle , ect. We hope to meet him or her someday somewhere, fell in love with them and be together forever,
however, the more we wish so, the more we find that it is hard to find the perfect mate.Just take a look at the high divorce rate, constant quarrelling between couples, and the growing numbers of overage youth, you‟ ll easily feel in our way. Our group„s thesis
is that it is hard to find the perfect mate. We will tell you why we said so and the reasons that we think might account for this phenomenon in our following arguments..
It may seem to you that married couples have found their “ the perfect mate”, but
with arising divorce rate, you would not be so confident in this view. Nowadays divorce is a very common phenomenon, especially in young couples. People end up in divorce court because they wait too long to find solutions to the problems in their marriage (http://divorcesupport.about.com/od/maritalproblems/f/divorcerate.htm). So
divorce rates all across the globe have been rising rapidly owing to certain problems like incompatibility between couples, infidelity issues, lack of trust and understanding, and financial pressures (http://www.divorcerate.org/). For example, the CNN News
reported that in China the divorce rate –the number of divorces per 1,000
people-stood at about 1.85 per thousand in 2009, but the figure was only 0.4 per thousand in 1985
(http://edition.cnn.com/2010/WORLD/asiapcf/06/18/china.divorces/index.html?_s=PM:WORLD). It is sad to observe that the rising divorce rates across the world and see marriages breaking (http://www.divorcerate.org/).
However, for couples who didn‟t end up divorced, does it mean they are “the perfect mate” for each other? no, they quarrel or even fight now and then over small
matters, such as drinking habits, hoarding objects, doing the washing up, deciding what to watch on the TV and so
on.( http://cn.reuters.com/article/pressRelease/idUS80019+09-Nov-2010+HUG20101109?symbol=NDA.ST) Most of the time , money are involved. According to a survey by DIY life insurance company in Japan, 56.2% subjects says they are disagreeing on money issues.(http://www.thisismyindia.com/writers_fourm/divorce.html)For example, the brand of electronic instruments to purchase, or the amount of money to spend on colothes. In either case, they at least admit their mate is not financially perfect to them
The phenomenon demonstrated above terrified the young people. More and more young people choose to stay single until they have exceeded the lawful marriage age, which make it harder for them to find the perfect mate. This group of overage youth even give boost to a booming marriage industry like the marriage nets, marriage agencies, and Television dating programs. If you pay attention to the TV program You Are the One, you will find it that though spending a long time staying on that stage, a lot of female guests still can‟t find their perfect mate. According to an investigation, carried out by the Research Center of Shanghai Municipal Communist Youth League in 2010, on the marriage and love matters of the local overage youth, 66.9% of those surveyed said that having not find the right person is the main reason accounting for staying single, and 58.3% people thought a small social circle came to be the second reason for their situation
As for the reasons that account for the difficulty of finding the perfect mate, we think firstly, we don‟t have enough time to do this. Nowadays, the pace of life is increasing with technological advancements, so as the job stress. The heated competition, financial challenges, relation problems and so on, all of these, keep bothering us, leaving less private time for us to search the perfect mate. Perhaps your perfect mate was just on your side while you were too busy to realize it. In addition, the world is so big and people are so many. We just have not that much time to love
for who they are, but enjoy the transient relaxed feelings. As a result, you find the so-called perfect mate before is no longer the perfect one but a traveler in your life. In one word, we just have not that much time to search for a mate carefully, let alone the perfect one
The second reason that makes finding the perfect mate hard, as we thought, is the truth that no one is perfect in every way and we are different. So selecting a mate with the qualities we need and of the same mind with us is hard if not impossible. Besides, Everyone has their own point of view on “the perfect mate”. It‟s like you are a half of
a circle, the perfect mate is another half and together you two become a complete circle. Some people want to find a perfect mate who can complement his character, But others hope that their perfect mates‟ character, preferences and hobbies are the
same with themselves. There are also other circumstances, for example, you think the girl who has beautiful appearance, smart and elegant is your perfect mate , but she don‟t regard you as her perfect mate.
So, as you can see, finding the perfect mate is a mutual process, you succeed when you find the person who is finding you. However, sometimes, we create problems for ourselves. We change our definition of the perfect mate as we grow. For example, during one‟s youth, we might think highly of the appearance. A charming
and romantic person was the good choice. But as time goes on, we may turn to value the inside beauty more. The perfect mate doesn‟t have to be tall, handsome, and fair
of face or wealthy, but must be beautiful on the inside. In all, people have different needs, and their views on the perfect mate change At different times in life , making it hard to find the perfect mate for his life.
As what we are talking about, with the phenomenon, like high divorce rate, quarrelling couples and overage youth, we think it is hard to find the perfect mate. As coming to the reasons, we list three after taking insight into the phenomenon. First, as we growing up, we're suffering more and more pressures; we have to work hard,
fighting for our future. So it's not easy for us to spent times on the finding mate stuff, not to mention to find the perfect one. Second, the views about the perfect mate change from people to people. Let's take it this way, if all our imagination about the perfect mate are the same, at least we can try to be the perfect one for each other, but without the unified standard, we don't even know what can we do to satisfied the one we love. Last but not least, person's definition of the perfect mate changes with time. Take a man for example, his type about women are different when he comes to the different age. Take all those together, we think it is not unjustified to say "It is hard to find the perfect mate."