College of English
DIFFERENT PARENTAL ROLES IN AMERICA
A Mid-term Paper
Submitted to Miss Cai
in Partial Fulfillment of the Requirements for
the Course of Intercultural Communication
We all know that different people in different areas play an different role. It is closely connected with the local culture,local politics,local economic and so on. Now, I wanna talk about the different parental roles in America and in China. I、Father’s Different Roles in America and China
I always felt that China, a country with five thousand years‟ history, is the
country that treasures family values most, the country has the most standardized ethics, and the country people share their family relationships most in the world. In China, home is the warmest and sweetest harbour, the warmest breeze and the deepest
?mission. „Of all virtues filial piety is most important‟ ~百善孝为先?„ A harmony
?family will prosper~家和万事兴?‟? etc, there are a large number of ancient mottoes
in the ancient books. They all reflect Chinese family values. While when we remind that American children always do not respect their parents by their first names and they show ignorants to their family after they are independent, I am much proud of my born in a polite and etiquette country. However, with my deeper understand of Americans, I changed my mind. I even admire them, especially American males. i、American Fathers
American fathers always treasure their family most and put it first. We can often see on TV programs and American movies that show their family values. Whatever how evil and cruel those characters are, they are connected with their families more or less. Even in those science fiction movies, those parts about family are usually the warmest.
I once saw a thing on American fathers‟ family values on movies. An American
father got the massage that his child was ill in bed. So, he was worried and upset. One of his superiors found his sadness and asked what‟s the matter with him. After
knowing it, the superior blamed him for not going back to his home to take care his child and suggested him ask for a leave. Latter, this affair was heard by his boss. His boss also showed care and greetings to him. It made him so scared that he went back home quickly.
American polit1ics are also closely combined with family. If a male (usually a
father) want to vote for a position in government, he must cares his families well, because they think that a public official can love others and his electorates and govern the country well only when he loves his families and take well care of them.
In America,people‟s supper must eat with their families. Their working time habit makes them hard to have lunch with their families. Therefore, supper is the only time that they can eat with their families.
American fathers are admirable. However, what Chinese fathers usually do is a little different.
In China, fathers always regard their career as the most important thing. Just imagine, a wife is hugging her little baby, looking at the foods on the desk, and her eyes showing worried., while his husband is busy with his business. What do Chinese people usually think? There is no doubt that they will say the father is full of enterprise, not lacks family values. There is an interesting phenomenon that those fathers who have succeed in their career have an increasing tendence of not going home on time. They do not feel proud of going home on time. In turn, they abuse alcoholic and even find mistresses out side.,They feel that as if only by doing that could they realize their real value. And some even equal the family values with hen-pecked. The traditional Chinese virtue is gradually disappearing. I am so sorry about it.
Father is an important constitution of family. Most of them are the main supporter of their family. No matter he is an American father or a Chinese father, the importance of family value should not be ignorant.
II、Mather’s Different Roles in America and China
It‟s clear that there are a lot of poems for mother. For example, the “I cannot
?remember my mother “ “I cannot remember my mother
only sometimes in the midst of my play
a tune seems to hover over my playthings
the tune of some song that she used to
hum while rocking my cradle.
I cannot remember my mother
but when in the early autumn mornings
the smell of shipful flowers floats in the air
the scent of the morning service in the temple
comes to me as the scent of my mother.
I cannot remember my mother
only when from my bedroom window I send
my eyes into the blue of the distant sky
I feel the stillness of my mother's gaze on my face
has spread all over the sky. (我不记得我的母亲?只是在游戏中间?有时仿佛有一段歌调?
?了整个天空。?” And the poem “As If “ “I never to refused wildly and dice a paper,
always retention — retention,
folding of some very small's white boats,
from steamship in big sea,
some to blown ship window ,
some waves wet, affix on the ship's front,
I still not discouraged fold every day.
Mother, if you Seen in dream a small boat,
not surprised it unprovoked in dream,
this is your love's daughter tears folding.
The trials of a long journey, pray it bearing it love and sorrow to gone。(我从不肯妄弃
端入梦。这是你至爱的女儿含着泪叠的?万水千山?求它载着她的爱和悲哀归去。 ) “
Mother is often praised. But does mother /male have equal rights in real society?
i、 Chinese Mothers
In China, most women are limited in the characteristic of good wife and good
mother. As the poem said ” A fair lady is a gentleman's good partner” (窈窕淑女?君
?子好逑? Women‟s inner characters, like kindness, consideration, hard-working and
so on, are more favoured. Looking for it‟s reasons, it is connected with Chinese traditional cultures to a great extent. In Chinese traditional cultures, federal thoughts
and federal system occupied the governing position a long period of time .In addition,
the hierarchy in Confucianism limited people‟s mind. No matter a father and a mother
is in the society or at home, the father always takes the main position. And woman must obey her husband‟s commands. It‟s called ” Wifely submission and virtue ”(三从
It‟s no denying that with the globalization going on, women‟s social position has
been greatly improved. For instance, in modern China, women‟s roles have been
greatly changed. Nowadays, we can see successful women in walk of life. Many of them do not just stay at home to be a entirely housewife, but also go out and struggle for their career. At last, they succeed. What‟s more, their outlook of wold, life and
values have been changed , too. They are more confident, more self-esteem, more self-discipline and more responsible. They wanna be equally treated in all aspects. They are more and more powerful.
Compared with Chinese mothers, American ones are more open and freedom. They have more rights to do what they want to do. Just take sex as an example, they don‟t shy to talk about it. And they can have sex with others if they want before they are married. It‟s called experience life and discovers themselves. The famous sculpture--Venus de Milo, clearly shows us their open.
Mothers should have their equal rights to work, to relax and to amuse themselves. They shouldn‟t be limited at home to obey her husband‟s orders. A peaceful and
harmonious family should be established upon both mother‟s and father‟s efforts. And
fathers should have family values and take care of their families.
? Wang, Y . B. 王永彬~清? : 围炉夜话Fireside Chat 黄山书社 / 2002年2月 ? Wu, J . R 吴趼人 : 20年目睹之怪现状Strange Situation of 20 Years Witnessed
上海古籍出版社; 第1版 (2011年10月17日)
? Tagore : As If
http://www.gs.xinhuanet.com/jdwt/2007-05/11/content_10004333.htm, ? Bing . X 冰心 : Paper Boat 纸船
http://wenku.baidu.com/view/b0f8a9d528ea81c758f57879.html, ? 《诗经. 国风. 周南. 关雎》?周代 http://baike.so.com/doc/5333580.html, ? 《仪礼?丧服?子夏传》 《周礼?天官?内宰》