October 30, 2006
Larkin Love Weekly Third Edition
QuickTime?and aTIFF (Uncompressed) decompressorBy: Dan Marmor are needed to see this picture.
With towels wrapped around our
waists, we showed up to the house
meeting saying, “I be from Jamaica, mon…
Lord have mercy!” Nat, in his tree-bark bikini and grass skirt answered the question of, “What part of Jamaica?” with
the classic, “Right by the beach.. Boyeee.” Steve Larkin is a famous Larkinite However, the bare chests, and
bikini tops are going to be turning into
windbreakers and coats as the seasons
change. When it is even colder, in
January, Larkin is supposed to go on a ski
trip and stay in a house that sleeps 18. We could have squeezed into a shack, but
7 bedrooms and a foldout couch is even
Oh, and the biggest discussion of QuickTime?and aTIFF (Uncompressed) decompressorare needed to see this picture.the year finally ended with the decision
that Larkin is getting Hoodies, not zip-ups. The debate was heated and lasted
weeks, but it has finally been settled, and
I‟m glad because zippers always
Now a moment for a shameless Nat as always, Lookin‟ like a
million bucks plug… There is a Carnaval, the chicano
kind, to celebrate Dia De Los Muertos on
November Third. It is before The Frosh
Formal so I expect everyone to go..
Ok, so how do I stall, oh yeah… by
making everybody stand up in birthday “It Sucked, what?!” order so I-Dan Tuller when can set up the projector for asked about the the Scavenger Hunt Slideshow. That‟s
House Meeting the genius that goes into these house
meetings thanks to the Larkin staff. The
slideshow was full of transvestites, kisses,
fights, robots, dropped pants, and huge
bananas. The Winners, I am proud to say
were, Dan B., Frank, Kelley, Kevin, Jun,
Becky Joseph, and Kelsey with the
Larkin Love Weekly Page 2 of 3
The Mausoleum Party “The great larry bird, jersey 33 When you take a sip, you buzz like a hornet billy BY Dan and Heather Shakespeare wrote a whole bunch of sonnets -LFO Lame.
“BBQing Things Is a Fun Thing To Do” “
By Heather Buckelew
The general lameness of Friday evening did not stop the Larkin
dorm gov from putting on a fabulous
BBQ. Complete with a performance by
the Jackson Five, an appearance from
Mao, and the best looking Zoolander
and Hansel Stanford has ever seen.
The BBQ thrilled Larkinites, and QuickTime?and aprovided a welcomed alternative to theTIFF (Uncompressed) decompressor are needed to see this picture.
hamburgers inside the dining hall.
Although I didn‟t get my fix from the
FroYo machine, the BBQ was still the highlight of my Friday night.*
Though many Larkinites were Jackson 5? not dressed up for the BBQ, pictures
from evening prove unequivocally that
Larkin is the best-dressed dorm on The Ian in All of Us campus. John, wore full body paint and
became the role he was born to play: By Dan Marmor the Jolly Green Giant, and Kevin and Ian had an hour and twenty Pablo displayed their undying love for minutes left to finish his paper. He was each other by dressing up as K-Fed only on page three. He was getting closer and Britney respectively. to the end, but he still had to summarize another book. The paper needed to be 6-
8 pages. Only halfway through, he
QuickTime?and aTIFF (Uncompressed) decompressordecided to turn on his music. He closed are needed to see this picture.* What does this stay about my Friday nights? the door to his dorm room in an attempt to make himself concentrate so he could
summarize „Pornography and Sexual
Aggression” for his paper on obscenity
crimes in peace.
Hansel? He flipped through the pages
frantically. His hope of finishing his
essay was dwindling as the clock was
chasing him down. He only had forty-five
minutes left until he had to submit it
through coursework. He started biting his
finger-nails realizing that he still had to
rush through his book. “What should I
do?” he thought, “What should I DO?!” In
Page 3 of 3 Larkin Love Weekly
Frank Fan: The Manly Man Ninja Sighting
By Heather Buckelew By Heather Buckelew All Larkinites should remain on You see him at parties carrying guard for a swift and sneaky around a rubiks cube, and when drunk Ninja who has been severing he will do your math homework for you, limbs over the past two weeks. but what do you really know about Unless, of course, you are Frank Fan? Frank Fan, after many standing next to Mukie who has years of being misunderstood by his discovered that Ninja‟s cannot classmates, developed a cult-like resist the power of the banana. following at his high school, where Bananas, for future reference, people were inevitably drawn to him by are to Ninjas as garlic is to his incredible ability to solve proofs vampires. and his promotion of cannibalism. This
following continued into his transition
to Stanford with his Facebook group “If 100,000 people join this group I will give up cannibalism” and his dream PLEASE SEND ARTICLE in which every Larkinite would someday SUBMISSIONS!!! Or master the Rubik‟s cube under his QUOTES OR ANYTHING, tutelage. He has continued his COMMENTS! WHAT EVER cannibalistic campaign, during House MAN!!! JUST SEND meetings where he questions whether SOMETHING TO the Donner Party “would involve eating HCBUCKEL@stanford.edu people” and continues to gain press for Or his cult through the Daily where he QuickTime?and aTIFF (Uncompressed) decompressorare needed to see this picture.DMARMOR@stanford.edu was quoted as saying that “cocaine and WTF!?!?! rubik‟s are even more fun together” Frank also played a major role Dung in cinching in the win for his group -Water People during the Scavenger Hunt. He Saliva Juggernaut About Our Organization… rejected all of his parents‟ teaching Salisbury Jamboree and went punk in a dramatic display of loyality to Larkin. “I did it (got the Sometimes, we all must sacrifice what we hold dear in order to make a Mohawk) because it was part of the worldly advance. I am asking all of you to sacrifice showering for the next few scavenger hunt, because it was worth weeks to help the environment. 15 points” Immediately following the Water is a necessity to us all. Hygiene is not. We must take a stand loss of his hair was his bad-ass status and now Frank is known to every woman against the evil water people who wait in showerheads and watch us as we cleanse on the Stanford campus. Frank Fan, ourselves while they wait for their opportunity to steal the water we need to cannibal, rubiks cube enthusiast, conserve so badly.. promoter of the Larkin way.
Question: If you smell, can you still get the ladies?
Regard or Disregard this message,
Dan and Heather
picture or graphic.